What Not to Do When Getting a Divorce

divorce_2147804bAnyone who has been through it can tell you: divorce is not easy. Tension is high and couples can make bad decisions in the heat of the moment. With the vast amount of financial, emotional, and practical details that have to be sorted out, it’s not a surprise that some couples make critical mistakes with their divorce.

That being said, there are many key things you should do, or not do to make sure you don’t regret you choices later. Here are some things to avoid when filing for a divorce.

Don’t Forget to Change your Will

A will does not automatically get revoked when you get a divorce. If you don’t want your soon-to-be ex to receive any of the benefits given to them in your will, you need to change it. This can be done at any time. Be aware, however, that if you happen to die before the divorce is granted and your spouse has nothing left to them, they can sue and recover part of your estate.

Don’t Dismiss Collaborative Divorce or Mediation

Collaborative divorce is when you get the help of professionals, such as attorneys, divorce coaches or therapists to help you through the divorce process in an effort to minimize conflict. They can help to divide property and manage your emotional stress. In most cases, a collaborative divorce will be much less adversarial than traditional divorce.

Mediation is different. Only one person (a divorce mediator) helps you and your spouse reach an agreement. Medication is usually an on-going process rather than a one-time intervention. Paid lawyers are usually not allowed in a mediation meeting, but you can consult your lawyer at any time during the process to make sure you are getting a fair result.

Do Not Take it Out on Your Children

Your children need to be in a supportive environment to deal with the stress of a divorce. Minimize discussions with them about the process. This will allow you to have more time with them and refocus your energy on attending school events, helping them with their homework, or taking them out to see a movie. If you are relaxed, they will be more relaxed. Even though you should be comfortable talking about divorce with your children, the idea of the divorce is to relieve the stress that you and your family have been experiencing.

Do Not Refuse to See a Therapist

It is highly recommended that you see a therapist to help you deal with the range of emotions that you will experience as you go through your divorce. Get help before you become extremely depressed or angry. A therapist is not only someone you can talk to, they can also show you how to relax, talk to your kids, and how to remain calm when you are in court.

Don’t “Settle” Too Soon

Just because you want to end your marriage as quickly as possible, doesn’t mean you should give up your financial security. Make several copies of your important financial documents like pension statements, tax forms and credit card statements. It will help you keep track of what you receive and what you owe. Make sure you and your children will have continued health coverage during and after the divorce.

The attorneys at Sherer Law Offices have been providing legal representation for divorce cases for more than 20 years. We will take the time to listen to your concerns and help to protect you best interests.

CONTACT us today for a legal consultation.

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